There’s a saying in the bible : Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the ways he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it.
Training a child thru wisdon, values and discipline will be more effective if you and your husband share the same principles. My discussions below would be based on the assumption that the parents have the same guiding principles.
For newly born babies until 3 years old.
1. Always have a ready smile to your baby. A loud laugh would be better. It’s good that they hear your approval thru laughter.
2. If your baby is trying to look smart or trying to impress you, always give your approval thru laughter, hug and kisses. BE GENEROUS WITH YOUR APPROVAL AND PRAISES. Tell your child — how smart, beautiful, handsome, kind , good child, etc etc etc they are. Such actions would build the baby’s self confidence.
DON’T LABEL YOUR CHILD AS SHY, INTROVERT, LAZY, etc in introducing them to other people or even telling it to your child. Your child may think he/she really is and end up just like what you’ve said.
3. If the baby is about 2 years old, he/she can now be told about good and bad. If he/she had done something wrong, you can gently slap his/her hand and motion a serious face and tell the child what’s wrong. If the child cries, hug the child and tell him/her that you love them still, and that they shouldn’t do it again. Always assure the child about your love for them.
4. At 1/12 -2 years old, the baby can now be told to fix his things little by little. For exampe – after playing with his toys, teach them to return them properly in the box or shelf.
5. When you talk to your baby, always have an eye contact. So that they will be used to it and not shy away whenever somebody talks to them. When doing anything like reading a newspaper, put it down and talk to your child eye to eye. Always give time to your child when they want to talk to you, even if how busy you are. Allow them to finish what they are trying to say, don’t interrupt them.
6. Children are very curious during this time 1-3 y.o., have the patience to explain to them every quesion asked, if you want them to be smart.
7. Don’t baby talk to them. Talk to them as if they are adults.
8. Start introducing them to eat vegetables and healthy food.
9. Don’t let them be addictive to TV and computer games. There should be limited time only.
10. Start to bring them to birthday parties or public places where they could interact with other children like McDonalds play sections. Teach them how to share toys and food. Teach them how to say sorry when needed. Teach them how to introduce themselves to their new playmates. This way, they would learn to be confident and how to deal with other children and therefore promote their emotional intelligence.
12. Start teaching them the value of hard work and patience. Before giving them anything they want, they must learn how to earn it. For example, the child shoud put the toys in order after playing with them or put his/her dirty clothes in the proper places. Do his/her coloring or reading first. Or the baby must be able to finish eating his veggies.
13. When going to Malls toy sections, brief the child that you have only so much money and that you cannot afford something not within the budget.
14. Start teaching the value of respect for elders, other children, parents and even to their baby sitter.
15. At 2-3 y.o. if the baby doesn’t have any allergy, you may teach them the value of caring for life and others through animals. You may want to give them say, little birds or fish to take care of. In this way, they would know how to value life by loving, caring and feeding others.
16. At the very young age… NEVER NEVER NEVER scold, embarrass or insult your kid in front of other people. The child may at early age loose his/her self esteem. Reprimand your child behind close doors. If you need to discipline your child, use a slipper or comb and slap the kid on the buttocks not in any part of the body. Afterwards, talk to you kid and explain to him/her that you did it because you love them. That you don’t want them to be a bad person. Then embrace your kid.
Never use your hand when you punish your child. Hand is use for touching, caring and hugging. I remember my son when he did something wrong, he took the comb and hid it somewhere so that i may not slap him. My son was angry with the comb not with my hand.
In contrast, I remember when I was a child, I remember my mother slapping me using her hand, that’s why most of the time, I back off everytime my mother would reach out her hand to me. I thought she was going to hit me with her hand. Maybe the reason why until now, we don’t touch each other.
17. PRAISE your kids before people so that they will have a healthy self respect.
18. MOST OF ALL TEACH THEM ABOUT THE LOVE OF GOD AND THE POWER OF PRAYERS.
